


A New Thief

by StoryTellerBoneZone



Series: Life of the World Arcana [3]
Category: Persona 5
Genre: I swear, Other, You will ship this, crackfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-04
Updated: 2017-06-04
Packaged: 2018-11-08 20:20:27
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,064
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11089194
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/StoryTellerBoneZone/pseuds/StoryTellerBoneZone
Summary: My parents would be so disappointed if they read this.





	A New Thief

The shift in momentos had always churned the guts of the Phantom Thieves. Between phasing into what seemed like a completely new dimension, the sick sense of dread that always tackles their psyche, and the general disfigured macabre, there was no wonder of why.

But today was nothing like the ordinary. The moment they had entered Momentos, a truly bizarre sight: a still creature observing from the shadows. It is not fully basked in the darkness, yet its presence seemed to grip the attention of all members of the Phantom Thieves.

The creatures remains motionless in a cauldron, modified to allow a war machine's treads to move it. There are two bodies of this creature, limbs twisting outwards and around itself. The creatures has an appendage on each limb, it's veins are visible even at a distance.  
More outlandish is it's attire. It wears a blue "skin" tight suit that covers itself up to the appendages who are listlessly slumped towards the ground. On top of that pure navy blue suit, is a maid attire so revealing that it would put Becky's apparel to shame. This creature does not have a head, even less a face. However, it appears to have a distinct brown foliage of a tanuki leaf individually wrapped on its appendages.

The Phantom Thieves stand around in shock. Any sort of a sane mood has been killed. Joker, despite his normally calm nature, seems to breath much faster than what he would like to show. Oracle looks around to the others of her group for guidance. Panther is simply dumbfounded, unable to move. Mona shook his head, disbelieving his eyes, and quickly turned himself into a car in case the others wanted to leave. Queen's mouth slowly opens wider with each passing second. Fox, however, has yet to notice his team's reaction, and begins to visualize a painting with the abnormality as the subject.

But Noir and Skull know. Noir clasps her hands together as her smile begins to widen. Skull, pushing past the disbelief, manages to hastily screech out the words, "Joker! Isn't that your plant!?"

And it was. It was the houseplant that resides in the attic of Leblanc. The true guardian to Akira.

The winds have quietly, and gently glided past the thieves ankles. The leaves of the houseplant tells them all they need.

"I swear I"m going crazy!" Skull begins his tirade. He looks to the others who, besides Joker and Noir, are now staring at him. He softly tugs at his hair as he exclaims, "I swear I just understood that thing! All this Phantom Thief work is gonna be the death of me! I know for a fact I basically heard itself say it's name is Pla-"

"Plant-Chan." Noir gleefully exclaims. Her interrupt and continuation of Skull's outburst had caught the attention of every group member.

"It's name is Plant-Chan and it's Joker's house plant. It's here to help."

"But... why...?" Oracle starts. Her face, overgrown with confusion, reminds Morgana of the time Joker was staring directly at it for over two minutes.

"Plant-Chan overheard Joker saying he was hurt. It wants to join the Phantom Thieves."

"How can you and Skull even understand it?"

There's a brief moment of silence. Joker clears his throat, adjusts his mask, and softly speaks, "I can understand it fine. It says only the truly kind can understand it."

"Wait a minute, I'm way more kind than Skull!" Panther argues. Another soft breeze wisps by their ankles, and it's leaves begin to blow gently in the breeze. There is another moment of silence.

Noir claps her hands to gather everyone's attention and begins, "I'm going to translate verbatim. My name is Plant-chan. I wish to become a phantom thief. I will protect you all. I have chosen the name "Mundo" for my Phantom Thief name. My mask is the leaves that hide my real leaves, the ultimate disguise. I have already unlocked my persona Yggdrasil. I can move on my own, but someone carrying me around would be appreciated."

The others take a brief moment to take all of it in. They're essentially stunned, with the exception of Skull who is having a mental breakdown inside the cat bus; as Ryuji questions his own sanity.

Makoto is the first one to say anything since the reveal by muttering under her breath, "If a plant can gain a persona, than this has really wierd implications..."

Futaba picks up immediately and shouts, "I know, right!? Plants have emotions, what happens when I prune a tree? Do computers have emotions too? Do plants have shadows?"

Yosuke interrupts by asking, "What would a Plant Persona look like? Is it as beautiful as Plant-Chan?"

Answering his question is an undisturbed silence. Instead, Akira simply picks up Plant-Chan and carries it inside Morgana, making sure to be careful of the leaves being masked by the leaves, and the tank treads on it's pot. The others, now having their own internal crisis, silently follow.

\---

"Joker, watch out! Those are three really tough shadows!" Oracle spouts from the safety of her persona.

The attack came at a lightning speed. Akira had half heartedly blocked the rising slash. Suddenly, he felt a calming presence as he was grabbed by a root the size of a train. The World Persona Yggdrasil had moved him, on the behalf of Plant-Chan. He had only been a single unlucky strike away from certain death, and Plant-Chan had saved him from that fate.

Plant-Chan's melee weapon was it's persona's mobile roots. However, more impressive, was Plant-Chan's arsenal of ranged attacks. In a single picosecond, fully sized Miniguns were held up by the thinnest section of Plant-Chan's leaves. In a cacophony of bullets, carnage, and destruction, Plant-Chan mows down two of the powerful shadows before it.

One of the shadows dissipates into a black mess while the other two remain. One of the shadows, weak to Plant-Chan's bullets, falls to the ground barely able to retain it's shape. An ominous wind blows through momentos. Nothing verbal is heard but Akira, Ryuji, and Haru know. They know what was cast: Maumudoon.

A purple essence fills the battlefield as Plant-chan rips the souls out of all who stand before it. Nervous sweat breaks off of Skull's temple as he realizes that he's not insane, and the world is more dangerous than he ever thought imaginable.

**Author's Note:**

> When did my life become so rad?


End file.
